Diary of a Black Sheep #7: Peace Be the Journey

Hi again! At first, I wasn’t sure what I was going to write to you guys this week. I’ve been working (Thank God), about to start school, and decorating/furnishing my new apartment.
If you read my first few posts you’ll know I dabbled in minimalism a little before I moved. Then when I did move out, I moved what I could take with me in my car by myself. Now technically I have done this before; first when I first started college and then moving to an apartment with my mom (these were within weeks of each other). However, it’s been about 5 years since I did that and my first time ever living on my own. This time, it was like trying minimalism for real. I do like parts of it, but I will say I don’t think I am a hardcore minimalist by any means. I like open space, I enjoy clutter-free, but I think I love shiny things too much.
Off the top, I can say I was more than ready and I love living on my own. There are some stressors as far as having to work and bills, but I love that I have a place to call mine. I feel like the work I put in at my day job actually turns over into something tangible that I can enjoy.
At first, I thought to move away was going to be sad. To be fair it was in some ways. I missed my friends, my counselor, and actually having bearings as to where I was. Not to mention, the savings I had when I moved was running out until I finally got a job and I slept on a floor for 6 whole weeks. I was beyond stressed about finding a job, but I’ve since gotten one and started investing in some furniture, namely a bed, thank goodness.
What I think was most important for me on this leg of the journey, is that for the first time in my life I am actually standing on my own two feet. For someone like me, it’s really important to know that I have earned what I have and with this experience, I have been able to do that. I did have a few friends help me out at the beginning, but for the most part, I’ve put this place together myself from the bottom and I am really proud of that. I don’t think this approach is the best for everyone, it definitely depends on the personality. For me though, I think I needed it my confidence. I have always been really independent (to a fault in some ways) and this experience has helped me become more certain in my capabilities. Before having to rely on someone financially or even having them help me get a job made me doubt myself. I don’t think I was right in this way of thinking necessarily, there’s more to people than finances and job references, but I do feel for me personally, I needed to try something else. Relying on myself and also moving to a new city and interviewing and receiving a job based on my skill set and how I presented myself gave me what I was looking for at the time (a little ego, anyone?).
That being said it has highlighted some of my weaknesses, for which I am also grateful. One, I love Trader Joe’s way too much and if I go to PetsMart with a cat adoption center I am leaving with a kitten 🙂 In all seriousness though, I have learned that I am still a little too closed off when it comes to meeting people and maintaining relationships and thus I have some new goals I’ll be tackling in the upcoming weeks and months.
I’m looking forward to yet another part of this journey and I hope that yours is going well too. If you’re comfortable sharing, I’d love to hear about some personal journeys you’re undertaking and how they’re going for you!

All the Best!

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